"your DNA is smarter then the people at IDEA" absolutely my favorite qoute

Rip: "You would look better if you gained about 10 lbs of muscle"
Woman responds with look of utter horror.
Rip: "Trust me, I've been looking at women a long time, and I'm really good at it."

"Baby mammals drink milk, and you sir, are a baby mammal."

I believe it's something like:

"Strong people are harder to kill, and more useful in general."

bench pressing is used to increase the size of your chest-icles

"You can't press without the shoulders....

..I guess you could leg press, but that's gay."

At the CF Games last year

Me: "Coach Rip, do you eat in the Zone?"
Rip: "Yep. I eat in it, above it, all around it."

"Strong people are harder to kill than weak people, and more useful in general."

Ooops, forgot my very favorite! At the Games last year, while explaining the rules for the CFT.

"We don't wear singlets because A...one...they're gay."

"get your tits up"

So many good Rip quotes. It's hard to choose.

"Any idiot can get on a treadmill and watch TV and then take great pride in the fact they've 'exercized.'" Mark Rippetoe

"With that in mind, and counter to the conventional industry wisdom, here are some more unfortunate truths:
• Your muscles cannot get “longer” without some rather radical orthopedic surgery.
• Muscles don’t get leaner—you do.
• There is no such thing as “firming and toning.” There is only stronger and weaker.
• The vast majority of women cannot get large, masculine muscles from barbell training. If it were that easy, I would have them.
• Women who do look like men have taken some rather drastic steps in that direction that have little to do with their exercise program.
• Women who claim to be afraid to train hard because they “always bulk up too much” are often already pretty bulky, or “skinny fat” (thin but weak and deconditioned) and have found another excuse to continue life sitting on their butts.
• Only people willing to work to the point of discomfort on a regular basis using effective means to produce that discomfort will actually look like they have been other-than-comfortable most of the time.
• You can thank the muscle magazines for these persistent misconceptions, along with the natural tendency of all normal humans to seek reasons to avoid hard physical exertion."
Mark Rippetoe.

"The interesting thing is that everybody really already knows this, because there are few examples in life that don’t follow the basic rules of the universe, the ones that dictate the behavior of everything. One of the most basic of those rules is that, with the exception of the occasional lottery winner, you pretty much get out of an effort what you put into it. We’re all quite familiar with this reality, although we are often willing to believe people who tell us otherwise, about exercise and about life. The sooner everybody—both halves of the population—accepts the fact that effective exercise is more like training for athletics and less like lying around on the floor, more about performance and less about appearance, the sooner it will be understood that women really don’t need their own figure salon." Mark Rippetoe

So much Rip to choose from, so little time!

"What we're trying to do is get things fixed, not allow them to stay broke."

"Does a bigger motor slow the car down? No. But a bunch of junk in the trunk does."

"I'm not interested in what's been done in the past. I'm interested in what should be done."

Great stuff. I may have to go to the barbell cert later this month in San Diego.

Lest we forget why we do the bench press...
"To develop big chesticles."

I can't quote verbatim because I was laughing so hard, but if you ever feel like you need a laugh, call Rip and ask him for some help regarding training cyclists.

Others I can remember.. "physiquers" "pissing up a rope" "nasty skinny"

"don't do this. if you do do this, do it at home so when the ambulance comes it doesn't get in the way of the other weight lifters."

In a slow drawl: "Pu-ush yer butt back."

"I was driving home the other night, listening to the radio, and the guy filling in for Art Bell on Coast to Coast AM was talking to some other guy about Nazis, UFOs, the Kennedy Assassination, time travel, and George Bush, and how it all relates to OneWorldGovernment. This, of course, made me think about barbell trainin, and it occured to me that good form on the barbell exercises should not be a matter for debate.
...
Good form is based on human anatomy and the physics of movement and should be harder science than that which is normally discussed late at night on the radio. It may not be as much fun, but it will be of more immediate benefit than Edgar Cayce could ever have predicted."
-Rip from the Article "Bad Form," CrossFit Journal, Issue 62, Oct 2007

Rip whispered this into a woman's ear (who had severe kyphosis and had a very difficult time pulling her shoulders back/pushing her chest out) while coaching her bench press:

"Now, push your tits toward me."

She immediately corrected her kyphosis and had AMAZING bench press form -- despite the fact that she and Rip were laughing so hard, the rest of us couldn't WAIT to know what the coaching cue was that worked so well.

Geez, Rip, how do you get away with it!? 'Cause you're just so authentic and such a great coach.

"Phil was a lot like a dog in that he vomited in
such a casual way."

CFJ Issue 69 - Low-Bar vs. High-Bar Squats

At the CrossFit Central's CFT Challenge in Houston this year....

"You must wear socks or workout pants on the Dead Lifts. We don't want your DNA on the barbell."

girls don't like big pecs! they like money and "this"!(as he indicates with his hand mid thigh on the leg)

Rip manually adjusts a young lady's squat position and says:

"If this young lady doesn't want me to molest her again, she'll do it right from now on!" - Rip

Sorry if I got that wrong that was in January 2006 that I heard that.

I live this one ... "Accumulating injuries are the price we pay for the thrill of not having sat around on our asses."

And people wearing gloves always make me think of this one ... "The only legitimate use for a glove is to cover an injury... A desire to prevent callus formation (possibly so as to not snag one's pantyhose) does not constitute a legitimate use."

The one above about OneWorldGovernment and barbell training is my favorite, though.

Here in Texas, the Highway Patrol has a slogan "Click it or Ticket" to help motorist remember to wear their seat belt.

As Rip is driving off on his new motorcycle he says, "this is my response to 'click it or ticket'. Typical Rip reasoning.